Pro Se Guide

How to Serve Divorce Papers

After filing for divorce, you must legally "serve" your spouse with copies of the divorce papers. Service of process ensures your spouse receives official notice and has the opportunity to respond. You cannot serve the papers yourself—a third party must deliver them. Common methods include personal service by a sheriff or process server, certified mail with return receipt, or voluntary acceptance of service.

Last updated: February 2026 • Reviewed by Divorce.law Legal Team

Why Proper Service Matters

Service of process is a constitutional requirement that protects your spouse's right to due process. Without proper service, your divorce cannot proceed, and any judgment entered could be void.

Without Proper Service

  • • Divorce can be dismissed
  • • Judgment may be void
  • • Case delays of months
  • • Additional filing fees

With Proper Service

  • • Case proceeds smoothly
  • • Judgment is enforceable
  • • Timeline stays on track
  • • Legal protection for you

Victoria Helps With

  • • State-specific rules
  • • Service checklists
  • • Proof of service forms
  • • Deadline tracking

Methods of Service

1. Personal Service

The most reliable method. A neutral third party physically hands the divorce papers to your spouse.

Who Can Serve

  • Sheriff or constable ($25-$75)
  • Private process server ($50-$100)
  • Any adult not party to the case

Best For

  • • Spouse may avoid service
  • • Need reliable proof
  • • Spouse's location is known
  • • Contested divorces

2. Certified Mail

Papers sent via certified mail with return receipt requested. Your spouse must sign to acknowledge receipt.

Requirements

  • Certified mail, return receipt
  • Spouse must personally sign
  • Keep green card as proof

Limitations

  • • Not allowed in all states
  • • Spouse can refuse to sign
  • • Someone else may sign
  • • Takes longer than personal

Note: Some states don't allow certified mail for initial divorce service. Check your state's specific rules.

3. Acceptance / Waiver of Service

Your spouse voluntarily signs a document acknowledging they received the papers. The fastest and cheapest option for cooperative spouses.

Advantages

  • Free (no service costs)
  • Immediate completion
  • Shows cooperation

Requirements

  • • Spouse must be willing
  • • Must sign specific form
  • • Signature often notarized
  • • File with court

4. Service by Publication

Last resort when your spouse cannot be located. You publish a notice in a newspaper for a specified period.

Requirements

  • Court approval required
  • Must prove diligent search
  • Publish for 3-4 weeks typically

Costs & Time

  • • $100-$500 publication fees
  • • Adds 4-8 weeks to timeline
  • • Affidavit of diligent search
  • • Court motion required

Filing Proof of Service

Critical Step: Don't Skip This

After your spouse is served, you must file proof of service with the court. This document proves your spouse received notice. Without it, your divorce cannot proceed to judgment.

Proof of Service Contains

  • Date, time, and location of service
  • Method of service used
  • Description of person served
  • List of documents served
  • Server's signature under oath

Filing Deadlines

  • File within 5-10 days of service (varies by state)
  • Keep copies for your records
  • Response period starts after service
  • 20-30 days for spouse to respond (typical)

Common Service Problems & Solutions

Spouse Avoids Service

If your spouse actively avoids being served, you have options:

  • • Hire a process server who specializes in difficult service
  • • Attempt service at their workplace
  • • Ask the court for permission to use alternative service
  • • Service by publication as last resort

Can't Find Spouse

If you genuinely don't know where your spouse is:

  • • Conduct a "diligent search" (last known address, relatives, social media, public records)
  • • Document all search efforts in an affidavit
  • • File motion for service by publication
  • • Court will specify which newspaper and duration

Spouse Lives in Another State

Out-of-state service is still possible:

  • • Personal service still works across state lines
  • • Certified mail usually accepted
  • • May need to follow serving state's rules
  • • Allow extra time for completion

State-Specific Service Rules

Service requirements vary significantly by state. Some states don't allow certified mail for initial service. Others require specific language in the summons. Always verify your state's requirements before attempting service.

Find your state's specific service rules

Let Victoria Guide You Through Service

Victoria AI provides state-specific service instructions, generates proof of service forms, and tracks your deadlines.