What Not to Do Before a Divorce?

What Are the Biggest Financial Mistakes to Avoid?

Financial missteps before divorce can cost you thousands. According to a 2024 study by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, 62% of divorce attorneys reported an increase in cases where hidden assets or financial manipulation affected settlements.

Do not:

• Hide or transfer assets — Courts can impose sanctions, award the hidden assets to your spouse, or hold you in contempt. Forensic accountants discover concealed assets in approximately 80% of cases where they're employed.
• Empty joint bank accounts — Withdrawing more than your fair share creates immediate conflict and judges view this negatively.
• Make large purchases — Buying a car, expensive jewelry, or other luxury items depletes marital assets and may be considered dissipation of marital property.
• Accumulate new debt — New credit card debt or loans may become your sole responsibility, especially if incurred for non-marital purposes.

How Can Social Media Hurt Your Divorce Case?

The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers found that 81% of divorce attorneys have used social media evidence in court proceedings. A single photo or post can contradict your claims about finances, lifestyle, or parenting.

Avoid:

• Posting about new relationships, vacations, or purchases
• Venting about your spouse or the divorce process
• Checking in at locations that contradict custody claims
• Deleting posts after filing (this constitutes spoliation of evidence)

Why Shouldn't You Date Before Your Divorce Is Final?

In 33 states that still consider fault grounds, adultery can affect alimony awards and property division. Even in no-fault states, dating before your divorce is finalized can:

• Complicate custody arrangements if your children meet new partners too soon
• Increase conflict with your spouse, leading to longer litigation
• Raise questions about when the relationship actually began
• Impact spousal support negotiations

What Custody-Related Actions Should You Avoid?

Moving out of the family home without a custody agreement can establish an unfavorable status quo. Courts often maintain existing arrangements, so the parent who stays may gain an advantage in custody determinations.

Do not:

• Leave without documenting a temporary custody arrangement
• Speak negatively about your spouse to your children
• Interfere with your spouse's parenting time
• Make unilateral decisions about schools, medical care, or relocation

Which Legal Mistakes Are Most Common?

Changing beneficiaries on life insurance, retirement accounts, or wills before consulting an attorney may violate automatic temporary restraining orders that take effect upon filing in many states.

Other legal pitfalls:

• Signing documents without attorney review
• Agreeing to informal settlements without written documentation
• Representing yourself in complex divorces involving businesses or significant assets
• Missing court deadlines or filing requirements

How Should You Prepare Instead?

Rather than taking impulsive actions, focus on:

1. Gathering financial documents — Tax returns, bank statements, retirement account statements, and property deeds
2. Establishing individual credit — Open accounts in your name alone
3. Consulting a family law attorney — Understand your state's specific laws before taking any action
4. Creating a post-divorce budget — Understand your financial needs for negotiations

The choices you make before filing shape your entire divorce outcome. Consult a family law attorney in your jurisdiction before taking any significant financial, housing, or relationship steps.